Tuesday, November 5, 2013

BBQ Pulled Pork

Meteor Bert: Well, it ain't a meteor.
Joe Dirt: Yeah, it is. It came out of the sky.
Meteor Bert: Well I'm sure it did but it ain't no meteor. It's a big ol' frozen chunk o' shit.
Joe Dirt: What?
Meteor Bert: Oh yeah, see them airplanes they dump their toilets 36,000 feet. The stuff freezes and falls to earth. We call 'em Boeing bombs.
Joe Dirt: No, that can't be. That's not what it is.
Meteor Bert: Oh, afraid so. See that peanut? Dead giveaway.
Joe Dirt: Uhhh, no, that's a space peanut.
Meteor Bert: No, afraid not. That just a big ol' frozen chunk of poopy.

Today I learned that no amount of clever camera work will make partially pulled pork look very good.
How to do it:
Get a pork butt, boston butt, shoulder roast, pork shoulder etc. Liberally salt your butt and let rest while you fire up your grill or smoker. I use charcoal briquettes with about 4-5 fist sized chunks of wood. If you're using a grill be sure to cook the butt indirectly.  You want to keep the temp between 200-350 degrees. Pork butts are forgiving so it doesn't really matter much. The higher the temp the shorter you window will be to pull it off the cooker when it's tender. After the cooker is ready go back and season the butt with the rub of your choice. Be very liberal with it. The rub creates a "Bark" that is the best part. It's the black stuff on the outside in the pics. Tastes like hot god if you didn't use a crappy rub. My go to butt rub I plan on a cooking time of an hour and a half pound but if this is your first time actually doing this on a smoker or grill plan on 2 hours per pound. It's going to vary depending on the meat itself and cooking temp and how many times you have to open your cooker. Avoid opening too much or it will take forever. Put you meat on. Now is a good time to drink a beer. It's basically required if you want to do this right.

Here is the secret to smoking a butt that people have a hard time with. Don't take it off until it's done. The internal temp doesn't matter so don't bother with a thermometer. It's going to be safe to eat hours before its done and the internal temp has nothing to do with it being tender. When you can stick a thermometer or skewer in it with little to no resistance its done. If you have a bone in butt it will be done when you can wiggle the bone and can pull it out of the meat. The internal temp might be at 190 degrees, it might be 220 degrees. Give yourself plenty of time and be patient.

Additional bbq nerd talk:
If you do use a thermometer you're going to notice that when the internal temp get to around the 170 degree mark it's going to "stall" for a while. At that point is when all the fat and connective tissue inside melts. Pull your meat from the cooker before and you're going to have a bad day with tough meat. Not bad really but you'll need to slice it cuz its never going to pull apart.  

Monday, November 4, 2013

bacon dillies/jalapeno popper alternative for big babies that don't like heat

Jalapeno popper alternative 

scooped out vinegar husbands
filled with cheese
a stuffed elephant
wrapped in bacon
'n stuff

cooked things
How to do it: Cut the pickle in half and scoop the guts out. Mix the two cheeses together and fill the hollowed out pickles. Wrap in bacon. Use toothpicks to hold the bacon if you need to. Grill or bake them in the oven until the bacon is cooked.

You need:
Dill pickles
12oz softened cream cheese
8oz cheddar cheese
bacon strips

WARNING! No one is actually allowed to make these. One day I may get a concession stand at the state fair and sell bacon dillies to the masses and run the pickle guy out of business. 6 figure income made in two weeks people.

Monday, October 21, 2013

butt rub

Notes: If you plan on a long cook use Turbinado sugar instead of brown sugar. It won't burn. 
Feel free to sub different chilies if you can't find New Mexico chilies but don't use a smoked chili like chipotle if you are using a smoker. Smoked chili+smoked meat=overkill. 

I use this mainly for pork but it's a good all purpose seasoning for chicken too. Probably would be good on fish too but fish is kind of gross so I don't really eat it. 

1/2 c Turbinado sugar
1/4 c Ancho chili powder
1/2 c hot New Mexico chili powder
1/3 c onion powder
1/3 c garlic powder
1/4 c dried thyme
2 T marjoram
1 T ground coriander
1 T ground cumin
1T ground black pepper
2 t allspice
2 t cinnamon
2 t celery seed
2 t ginger

rub the butt

Friday, October 18, 2013

Beer Cheese Soup

As you can tell I don't really use this anymore but since I had a bunch of people ask for this recipe I decided to post it here for you. Enjoy!

Melt butter and sauté carrots and onion until lightly caramelized. Add garlic and continue cooking for another minute or two.
Stir in Tabasco and season with salt, pepper and cayenne pepper.
Stir in chicken stock/broth and beer and simmer for about 10 minutes.
Stir in cubed cheese. When melted add the half and half/milk.
Add Dijon, dry mustard and Worcestershire sauce.
Stir the cornstarch in the water and dissolve before adding to soup.

3 carrots-chopped
1 large white or yellow onion-chopped
4 Tbsp butter
2-3 cloves garlic-finely chopped
Tabasco sauce
Cayenne pepper
Couple beers
4 cups chicken broth or stock
4 cups half and half or milk
2lb Velveeta sharp cheddar-cubed
1 Tbsp Dijon mustard
1 Tbsp Worcestershire sauce
1 tsp dry mustard
1 cup water
¾ cup corn starch